My little boy was twenty in July. Somehow, I never imagined this time. I thought vaguely sometimes of 'when he is grown up' but mostly I just got on with the present. It wasn't always easy being a single parent, there was never much money, but being everything to someone, is in my mind, a very precious thing, and we were very close. Life has become simpler as he has got older and also more complicated. As the mother of my grown up little boy, I watch while he lives his life and makes decisions I don't necessarily agree with. My advice isn't always welcome, I am learning to wait until it's asked for, and to step back and let him find his path. He has grown up into a bright, caring wonderful man - I still want to write boy, but he is twenty, so I will write man and try to convince my heart.
The other day I came across this song by My Brightest Diamond. The singer wrote it for her son and I think it's beautiful.
'If you grow up to be king, or clown or pauper, I will say you are my favourite one in town...'
I know that feeling so well! If you love him, you let him go...as you have. It's hard, but worth it.
ReplyDeleteI'm trying... (to my son, probably very trying) ;)
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